Updated: Mar 27, 2019
"Happiness is a choice” is something you must have heard it and repeated day after day. We repeat it to suffering family, to a hurt friend or to a sad work colleague. We fixate on the concept that happiness is a choice and we forget intentionally or non-intentionally that just like happiness, sadness is also a choice.
"We forget intentionally or non-intentionally that just like happiness, sadness is also a choice." Ahmed El Helaly Tweet this
“You need to learn how to select your thoughts just the same way you select your clothes every day. This is a power you can cultivate.” Eat Pray Love
There are those people who choose to be sad, maybe not by declaring it, but by acting upon it. See, the relation between happiness and sadness is somehow a mixup. meaning that a lot of time sadness is not in the opposite way of happiness, its rather in the middle of the way. Just like that dark tunnel that you pass through to go to the other end, its dark, risky and lonely, but it is the only way to cross over. That exactly what most of the time sadness is, not an opposite, its a right of passage. But sometimes when we pass by that sadness we crumble and fall down, remain there and act as if we “failed” which is not true, the only thing we failed at would be failing to see that is this a transition phase that need to be lived so we could be able to pass it.
So yes I choose to be sad, I choose to feel my sadness and embrace it. Did you ever hear the phrase “sometimes to go forward you need to move backward 1st” ? Sadness, setbacks, all of these are considered for many people failures while they are in fact the last moment before the kickstart of your happiness, success.
Did you ever hear the story of Bill Gates ? Steve Jobs, Mark Zuckerberg, J.K. Rolling, Mohamed Salah and many others who are considered icons in their fields. Ever noticed that all their stories included setbacks and failures, included sadness and moments of self questioning? but they all passed it, because yes they did choose to feel sad, but they chose not to be sad, and there is a big difference. Feeling sad is an emotion, that we must feel to be able to see where we went wrong, its a motivational thing if used in the right way. While being sad is a state of mind, it is a self built roadblock that prevent you from completing you journey, an eye blinder that stops you from seeing the way ahead.
Now tell me, did you ever passed by one of those situations where you felt sad and down but then realized that it was just a station to move to a better you?